Felix was born on a Sunday during what would have been my last prenatal yoga class. I woke up early that day feeling pretty antsy, so instead of going back to sleep I got up to do some dishes and laundry. Tyler made some coffee and we enjoyed a quiet morning together. Amelie had spent the night at her grandma's house so both of us were able to get a good nights sleep.
We had plans to go to the St. Paul Farmer's market to stock up on some fruits and veggies. I had just bought a Vitamix and wanted to start making green smoothies and peanut butter and soup asap. Before we left, I noticed a teeny tiny bit of bloody show, and since that was literally the very first sign of labor I had seen in the 13 days since my "due date" had come and gone, I said to Tyler, very casually, "we might have a baby today."
We still went to the farmer's market, and I noticed that I was starting to have some contractions that felt different that the Braxton Hicks contractions I had ben having for the last month. I made Tyler (unwillingly) stop to get gas since we were running low and I knew I wouldn't want to stop on the way home from the market. We took a quick lap around the market and got a bag full of greens. A woman at the market asked when my baby was due was, I told her it was 13 days ago, and hopefully I'd be having a baby later that day.
When we got home I called my midwife Clare to tell her that I thought something was happening and today might be the day. She stopped by before she went to teach her yoga class (which I totally was still going to try and go to), just to make sure that Felix was still head down. He had done quite a bit of flipping and flopping from transverse to breech and back during the last several weeks of my pregnancy. He was still head down like we suspected so Clare headed out to teach her class telling me to call her as soon as I needed her to come back. I decided not to go to yoga since my contractions were starting to get a little more intense and I didn't think driving was a good idea at that point.
Meanwhile, Tyler had gone to pick Ami up from her grandma's house, and when they returned she was a mess. She was crying and yelling and struggling to eat lunch and take a nap. I went upstairs to escape the chaos and try to rest a little, but as each contraction got more and more intense, I realized this baby was coming sooner than later. I propped myself up on some pillows on my bed and started moaning through each contraction, and during the rest periods I was texting my mom to have her come pick Ami up, my doula Nicole to tell her I needed her support, Tyler to tell him to set the birth tub up (even though he was just downstairs), and Clare to tell her it was time to come back. I was standing at the foot of my bed rocking back and forth through each contraction when Clare returned.
She was quietly setting things up in the bedroom when I felt a big pop and immediately realized that my water had broken. I ran into the bathroom and ended up staying in there on the toilet for something like an hour. It was a pretty good position to labor in and made my contractions we much more bearable. Nicole had arrived and we were having a normal conversation in between each contraction. Tyler had finished blowing up the birth tub and was scurrying around preparing for the birth.
Eventually I told Nicole that I wanted to move downstairs to the birthing tub and as soon as I got in the contractions got much more intense. I think I was in the birth tub for around 45 minutes when I realized I was already in transition. I really did know that this was going to be a fast and easy labor, although I kept telling myself to prepare for a long and painful one, just in case I was setting myself up for disappointment.
One of the most amazing things about this birth was that I could actually feel my uterus pushing Felix down and out. I kept reminding myself to relax, loosen my face and jaw, and not fight against the contractions. No one was telling me what to do, and it was almost as if I was there alone in the birth tub if it weren't for the occasional words of encouragement from Nicole and Tyler.
When the pain was at it's worst, Clare and her back up midwife Jane (Emme was on vacation) and her apprentice Rene were pouring hot water they had been heating on the stove into the tub to warm the water up. There were several hands in the tub mixing the hot water in and for some reason, I think the warmth of the water and the action of mixing it in made me start swaying from side to side and lessened the pain.
One contraction turned into a push. During another contraction I felt his head literally pop out and then his body just slid right out. I pushed maybe 5 times and Tyler helped catch him. I looked down and he was swimming right up to me. His cord was wrapped around his neck and Clare reached in and removed it and I lifted him right up to my chest. He started crying shortly after and I remember saying out loud, "that was so easy."
I sat in the tub with Felix for a while until my labor team helped me out and into his bedroom onto a mattress we had moved in there. Tyler and I sat in there for a nice long time bonding, doing some skin to skin contact, and getting to know our new baby. Clare came in to deliver the placenta and later on brought us in some eggs, toast, sausages and OJ. My mom came back with Amelie and that little girl was so excited to meet her new little brother that she couldn't stop talking or jumping around.
Near the end of my 42 week pregnancy I had gotten a lot of unsolicited advice and discouraging questions from friends and aquaintences. Everyone wanted to know when I would be induced, as if it was inevitable. I felt all along that Felix would come when he was ready, and that's what I kept telling everyone. He was very active the last 2 trimesters of pregnancy, I felt healthy and I was in great hands with my midwives. I trusted my baby and my body to do what was right. During this pregnancy, I never had an ultrasound, any invasive testing, a non-stress test, or my cervix checked...not even during labor. I had no fear of having my baby at home, in a tub, or past my due date. I credit my complete trust in my body's ability to grow and birth my baby to the education I have received as a birth doula/pregnant woman/mother, and in the care I received from the team we chose to help us birth our baby.
I don't necessarily like to compare Amelie and Felix's birth because they were two very different and equally incredible experiences. However, when I gave birth to Amelie, the experience was everything I had wanted it to be. We had her in the water at the hospital, medication free...but not completely intervention free. The midwife who helped us deliver was amazing and very hands off, and I think it was as close to a home birth as you can get in a hospital. I realize now that having a "home birth" in a hospital is next to impossible. After Amelie's birth I looked at Tyler and said,"I hope you had fun, because I am never doing that again." After Felix's birth I told him, "I would have 100 more babies at home."
And now, the pictures...
Thanks to Nicole for taking such great photos!
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